“Honey, I don’t want you to change for me“,
were the words that came out touching his soft lips,
that met tears rolling down his emerald eyes,
before he left, and I thought to myself,
who am I?
A year ago, I was a different person with
different habits, different priorities.
I change every day, for myself, for others,
for I am not these habits,
I am pure awareness and only that.
The awareness of his heartbeats against my heart,
the awareness of his breath against my skin,
the awareness of his presence around me,
these moments of awareness are pure bliss,
and that is who I am.
Moments of awareness where I felt the universe in me,
the same universe in him,
moments that revealed his soul to me,
and my love for him is who I am.
Everything outside these moments is ego.
I fear not to change,
I fear not to love deeply and fully, madly and unapologetically,
and see the ego die.
Though, it will never die. It will keep rising and
suppressing these liberating moments,
Yet I will find moments of awareness, how I find them right now,
and realize that to hold on to someone is not love,
but letting them go is.
Feeling the pain and love, seeing the ego die,
in these moments, is who I am.
The cover photo was taken in KeuKenhof, Netherlands.